a new patient of mine's youngest child just started university away from home, and she is feeling some fairly serious sadness about it.  she is also transitioning into her second spring, her periods are coming very irregularly now, her last one was about 7 months ago and it was "very light" in flow.  when i asked her what, exactly, she was feeling sad about, she mentioned that she feels sad that her role as a caregiver is ending, and on a deeper level she is wondering whether she will still be the same woman once she can no longer make babies.  she wonders "what will be my role if i no longer need to care for my children?"  this is a very common sentiment i hear from women during their transition - there seems to be a fear that by no longer menstruating, they are somehow becoming less of a woman.  i asked her to change her perspective.  instead of looking at menopause as the "end" of something, why not use it as a time to reflect on the success she did have, sending not only 1 but 2 kids into the world as strong, independant young adults?  why not look at the cessation of menses as a return of blood and energy to her own body, a way to nurture and nourish her own body and heart as she had nurtured her children? i asked her to start thinking about taking care of herself the way she had taken care of her children.  she told me she does take care of herself, in fact very well thank you very much.  so i asked her instead, "ok, can you tell me something you used to love doing before you had children?  something you always wished to go back to if you ever had the time or the energy?"  she could not think of anything on the spot.  after asking her about other health concerns she had, i gave her an acupuncture treatment, and compiled an herbal formula for her to take home.  when i returned to take out her needles 30 minutes later, i felt a shift in the energy of the room.  she said during her acupuncture treatment she was remembering when she was pregnant with her first child she stopped going to her dance classes.  she said she always wanted to learn belly dancing, and wondered if i thought it was silly for a 53 year old women to want to take belly dancing classes.  i told her this is exactly the kind of thing i was talking about, and i hope that she could find a class that would work for her.  when she joked that she now had more time to go to a class since she didn't have to worry about making lunch for anyone anymore, i knew a powerful shift had happened within her heart.  i anticipate her next visit with me, so i can ask her how her dance class went.